Monday, 24 October 2011 | 12:31

We received the following email from a reader who wanted share her story of struggling to co-parent. This isn’t–thus far–a story with a happy ending, but we hope it serves as a reminder to all co-parents about why cooperation, respect, and adhering to parenting agreements are so important for children’s well-being.
I have been divorced now for over 3 years. At the time of the divorce, my ex and I agreed to co-parent with a 5/2 and 4/3 split (me having the 4/5 nights in exchange for him keeping our daughter only on the days he doesn’t work).
Within the 1st month, we had issues with him not following the divorce papers regarding drop-off/pick-up times, not following first-rights*, and asking our daughter to call his girlfriend “mom” (and not to call me “mom”).
Since that time, things have continued to get worst. I have gone to therapy in efforts of resolving the issues and after having the therapist actually read my emails to him (giving me tips on how to best communicate), and a lot of other things – she finally just said that there’s nothing else I can do to fix this situation. I am just now starting the process of filing for sole legal and physical custody.
One message that I would like to get out there is that it takes two parents to make a child and two parents to work together to raise one. Honestly, I have tried my hardest to work with him and have requested him to get help with me on several occasions, but I can’t force him to co-parent with me.
Thanks for giving me a place to vent. It’s been a really long 3 years, and I just hope for my poor stressed out and depressed 9-year-old that things get better soon.
*Some co-parenting agreements include a first rights clause which states that if a co-parent has a scheduling conflict during his or her parenting time, instead of finding a sitter or someone else to care for their child, he or she will first contact the other co-parent to give them the opportunity to care for the child. This allows parents to spend as much “extra” time with their child as possible.
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Last Updated on Monday, 24 October 2011 | 12:33