(This is a repost.  Scroll down for more recent posts.  Happy New Year to all!)

According to several sources, it seems that January is the busiest month for divorce lawyers. Many people, particularly those with children, choose to wait until after Christmas, not wanting to ruin the holidays. At the same time, however, this time of year can also exacerbate existing marital problems and be the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back for couples in crisis. Money management and financial difficulties are often contributing factors in marital breakdown, so (excess) spending at Christmas certainly doesn’t help matters. Further, the busyness, hustle and bustle, and millions of little details that can be associated with holiday preparations and celebrations all can drive a troubled couple to the brink.

Some unhappy people even make divorce or a non-marital break-up their New Year’s Resolution.

Whatever the circumstances, if you are a parent and the beginning of a separation or the start of divorce proceedings has brought you to this site: Welcome.

There are many surprises that we encounter when life throws the divorce curveball at us. Since my separation and divorce several years ago, I have had many. Enough, in fact, that it is difficult for me to choose a favorite! Was it the cousin that, upon seeing me and my (now) fiancee, Sherry, in the grocery store, assumed I was on a secret rendezvous, refused to speak to me and ran the other way (yes, ran!). Or, was it the several friends and colleagues who, despite knowing how important my children are to me, assumed that I would move to New York to get a better job and get away from my ex-wife, Deesha.

One recent set of surprises inspired me to write this, my first solo post, for CoParenting101. As you may have seen elsewhere on this site, I am recently engaged to be married. In the weeks leading up to my engagement, I told friends and colleagues of my plans for for the event - I mentioned how I had told my children, spoken to Sherry’s mom and told my own parents. Almost without exception, these folks, after offering their heartfelt congratulations, asked in the gravest and most concerned tones, “What did Deesha say?” I was caught up short each time it happened.